Filosofi Teras

I have read many book and almost all of them are fiction. For me reading novels is a remedy whenever I feel tired. But lately, I’m into self-improvement book. I should’ve do earlier, but better late than never.

So, my favorite book for this moment is Filosofi Teras. A book by Henry Manampiring which talks about stoicism (filsafat Stoa). This book doesn’t only tell the stoicism’s principals but also how to do it in daily life. The author also tell his experiences as he tries to be a stoic. When it can be applied, how to do it, how it can change his life and many more.

For me, this book is a life changing book. It gives me new insight about how to be happy and how to be chill through life. I love almost all the topics. But if I may tell you some of my favorite topic, then here we go.

> “Have courage and be kind” We have to be kind. Despite the feedback or what other did to us, choose to be kind. Because we are designed to be it.

> “Some things are up to us, some things are not up to us” - Epictetus (Enchiridion). Our happiness only based on the things that are up to us, which are the things we can control. There are so many things we can’t control and they should not matter to our happiness, including people’s judgement to us. It’s important for me.

> You have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this and you will find strength.” - Marcus Aurelius (Meditations). It’s all in our mind. How we see one thing matters the most. 

Honestly there are many more interesting things in this book. Trust me, this is a fun and enlightening book. You have to read it. Maybe I’ll talked about this book more later.

My Favorite TV Series

Descendants of The Sun it is. Well, it is a 2016 South Korean TV series. We often call it by korean drama / drakor. Basically, it is a love story between Korean Special Forces named Captain Yoo Shi Jin, and a surgeon doctor, named Kang Mo Yeon. Their love story begins when they are stuck in Uruk.

What makes it so special is the series was the series aired right when I had my high school national examination. It perfectly ruin the examination atmosphere. My friends and I were really excited for every episode. Everytime the new episode aired, we had to watch it as soon as posible. We really can not wait.

Then, after the new episode aired and we all already watched it, we’ll talked about it. As soon as we arrived at school, we were not studying. We were talking about the new episode. We didn’t care about the exam. It wasn’t even like an exam week! 

But it is a good memory. My friends and I became so close because of the K-drama. After we graduated from high school, we often arranged some times to catch up on our holiday. That series made me find another bestfriends for me.

One and Only Sist

My little sister is the one and only sibling of mine. She is two years younger than me. We spend almost 24/7 together. 

She is an all-food-is-good person. Give her any food you have, she’ll eat that and say it’s delicious. There are only “this is good” and “this is very good” for her.

She is a korean drama lover. She could binge watching a korean drama all day long. Even she could rewatch any drama for many times. She also really enjoy korean reality show. In this quarantine months, everytime I hear her laugh, it’s obviously she is watching the korean reality show.

Not only she likes to sing, she also like to watch singing competition. She could rewatch singing competition videos for hundred times. One day, she forced me to watch a video of a singing competition contestant. “You have to see this. This is my favorite.” Then I watched it. After that, she forced me to watch another video and  said “This is my favorite, too.” After that, she changed to another video and said “This is also my favorite.” And it happened for like 50 times. “This is my favorite” for 50 times. Huft, yeah, that’s my sister. 

After all, she is the perfect sister I ever need. She is like a friend that lives with me. We could do many things together and have so much fun! I’d like to know something about your siblings, too. Write me some on the comment! 

Bestfriend

Back to several years ago, I had a bestfriend. I’m not going to tell you the name, let’s just call my bestfriend “A”. I forgot how we can get along. But A was a kind and fun friend for me. I put my trust on A. I told A many things. As A also told me many things.

Long story short, A did one thing I never think of. One thing that made me so so disappointed. One thing that for the old me was a sin. One thing that made me mad. I tried to tell A “the right thing”. But A didn’t hear me. I hated A so much. I chose to leave and didn’t want to talk to A.

Years go by and we finally talk again just life before. I realized that I was like an evil. I only thought that I was right and A was wrong. I thought life was only black and white. In fact, life is full of colors. It was me that can’t admit it. It was me that can’t appreciate the difference.

Then, one big thing happened and opened my eyes. Someone I thought “a right person”, made a fault I hate the most. While A talked to me sincerely. A even told me something that is 180 degrees different from what that “right person” did. I felt something in my heart. Just like there is a chemicals shed to my heart. 

It slapped me hard in the face and taught me that it is not the religion that make a person kind. It is the person itself. Whatever the religion is, if they want to be a kindhearted human being, then they will. If a person want to be mean, whatever the religion is, they will still be mean.

I come to the conclusion. It is not the religion that matter. It is how they treat other human being that matters. That’s all. Period.

And yes, it’s now good between me and A. I only wish the best thing and all happiness for A. As I wish it to my other bestfriends, too.

Happiness

 I’ve been in a point where I thought I would be happy if I could buy all things I want. It was all about stuffs. I told myself to work hard in the future to buy all the things I love. Bags, shoes, gadgets, clothes, makeups.

As the time goes by, my definition of happiness changes. Happiness is in my mind. It’s not about the things I don’t have. It’s about the things I already have and how I can be grateful for them. It doesn’t matter how many things I don’t have, I still can choose to be happy. As long as I have what I need, not what I want. I learn that to be happy is not all about material. I won’t deny it. Of course we need money. But there’s another thing we need.

Peace it is. For me, peace means you are grateful for everything and nothing can ruin it. Not a single comment on your social media. Not an opinion from your friend. Not a post that belongs to your friend. It is when you can control you emotion. Even though no one listen to you. Even though someone doesn’t appreciate your work. Even though things don’t always go the way you want to. You still can find one good point in a bad situation. It is when you find peace.

This pandemic teach me that happiness is not always a big thing. Even though I have to let go some of my dreams and my plans, I have something to be grateful. My family, my friends and I are all in a good condition. We are all healthy. That’s the most important thing now. And that’s my happiness now.

I am not trying to teach you all. I just want to remind you. When you are healthy and surrounded by the people you love, count them as a blessing and know that it is a happiness too.

One Last Cry

A song can fit your mood. A song also can make your mood. For me, a song has a power to remain me of someone. Usually that person has a place in my heart. 

Once upon a time, I met someone. A man with a perfect manner and an open mind. He has like everything but I saw no superior in the way he talked. He treated people well. He helped the waitress to clean our table. He said thank you to the parking man. He has all the list in my head. He also has my heart. But we are not meant to be together and he has his own life somewhere now.

One Last Cry by Brian McKnight. I saw a video of him singing this song and on that time, I surely fell for him. He got all my heart. Until now, One Last Cry still be a song that remain me of him. But, it’s not only because of that video I saw. It’s also because of the lyrics fits me so well. 

I saw him, not holding hands, but standing close to someone else. I sit all alone and wishing all my feeling was gone. I really had nothing to do. I only let myself to had my one last cry, before I leave it all behind.

My Favorite Movie

 I’m not a movie person. There are only few movies I have ever watched. A movie can affect my mood. So, when I watch a movie, it has to be a happy ending one. Most of those movies I watched are romance. It’s pretty hard for me to choose my favorite movie. But I have one movie that stole my heart. I even rewatch it until 3 times.

To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before. It’s basically a series that based on a novel. It’s a story about a girl named Lara Jean that loves to write love letters to her crushes but she never send them. She keeps them all on a secret box. Then, her little sister finds them and send them all. It’s the beginning of all the problem. But luckily it leads Lara Jean to her first love, Peter Kavinsky. Their relationship is full of drama that slowly makes them fall in love even more.

This movie is not a legendary one. But it stole my heart. How Peter treats Lara Jean, how he respects her value in life, even how he treats Lara Jean’s little sister. He is a gentleman and I fall for him! I love everything about him, really.

This movie is entertaining enough for me. It is a good movie to watch when you are bored in your free time or when you are not in a good mood. But be careful. You might fall in love with Peter, just like me.

Actually, there are many good quotes from the novels. But they don’t make it on the movie. So, here’s my favorite quote from To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before 2.

“I know now that I don’t want to love or be loved in half measures. I want it all, and to have it all, you have to risk it all” - Lara Jean

Single and Happy

It’s interesting to talk about being single and happy. Too interesting until I hardly choose what to talk about. All right, I guess I’ll just my experience about how to be a happy single lady! Where’s my single sis at?!

Who says being single sucks? It’s not. The only thing that make it sucks is your mind. As Epictetus said “It’s bot things that trouble us, but our judgement about things.” You keep thinking that being single is pathetic. I admit that there are some days I feel lonely and wish I were in a relationship. But as the time goes by, I realize I could be single and still happy.

Being surrounded by loving friends make me a little bit forget that I’m single. I could spend as much time as I want to be with them. Doing all the fun things (in a good way), going to places and enjoying life. When I have something in my mind and need someone to talk to, I’ll call one of my friend then talk for hours.

So, what if all of my friends are busy with their life? I’ll spend my time for myself only. People call it “me-time”. I will make my coffee, open my laptop, set my bed and binge watch youtube video all day long. Or I will prepare some snacks and read any book. Or I will take my make up and put them on my face while sing along with my playlist. Or I will simply scroll down my Instagram. 

When I see a couple, do I envy them? Sometimes yes. It’s when I see my perfect kind of relationship. Do I want to be in a relationship? Of course, yes. But I’m not that tipe of people that will do any thing to get a man. I will not degrade my standards. It’s not my class. Sorry not sorry.

Are you happy? I am. I am a single woman and I can loudly say I’m happy. After all the things I passed in my life, I see that happiness doesn’t depend on your status. Whether you are a single person or you are in a relationship, you can be happy. Happiness is a choice. You do you. It’s all in your mind. If you want to find your way to be happy, then you will. It’s that simple.

So, for all of you single ladies, go dress up, wear your make up, go to the place you want to, do whatever you want to do as long as it is good for you. Live your life and be happy!

My Parents

 Talking about my parents, first of all, I am truly thankful for them. They are truly the bestest (if it’s a word) for me. I can say that I’m everything I am because of them.

My dad is the most hardworking person I ever know. He takes all his responsibility at work really serious. 

For me, he is a hero. He drops me to school everyday. He accompanies us when my mom, my sist and I go shopping. When my mom, my sister and I had to buy something. He literally be there and stays with us no matter how many mall we have to go. Yes, we are that kind of girl that can go from one mall to another and end up go to all the malls. Never I heard my dad says he is tired. I need to find a man like him, indeed.

When I was little, I really love weekend. I still remember when we used to go to Samarinda on weekend. Well, it’s like 3 hours from Balikpapan. My dad drove the car all the way and back. My dad also brought us to some zoos and beaches. We spend almost every weekend by going to the beach. Playing by the sea or cycling or as simple as enjoying the beach with some coconut. That’s why I love beach.

My mom is my role model. She is a woman I want to be. An independent, smart and kind woman. She thought me to be a kindhearted person. She always says that we have to be good to all people. She also can do almost everything. 

She is my first teacher ever. She still help me studying until I was in junior high school. She has a good style. I often borrow her clothes because our body size is look alike. She is the chef in our home. She mostly can cook everything.

My parents are not that kind of possessive parent. They give me freedom. But before I can have that, they already teach me all the basic things. 

I love them. With all my heart. They mean the whole world to me. They are the reason why I go this far. To make them happy is my biggest dream. I will give them all things I could. As they already give me all the things they could. 

Places I Want to Visit

It’s a little bit hard for me to talk about places i want to visit. It’s like talking about my dreams specifically, which is a personal thing for me. But never mind, I’ll let you know some.

Once upon a time, I was scrolling down my Instagram. There was a picture that stopped me. Aurora. Captured beautifully. I still remember it was a picture from Om Eja (@rezaphlv). I read the caption and found that it is a picture of a night sky in Iceland. Fyi, I am obsessed with night sky, moon and stars (well, my bestfriends know it exactly). Since I saw that picture, Iceland became a place i really want to visit one day. 

Next, Japan. I fall in love with Japan’s blue clear sky. Of course I never been there before. I saw that on Arief Muhammad’s vlog and on some influencers’ instastories. Japan will always be in my bucket list.

I still have so many places I really want to visit. Maldives with all the beautiful sea, New Zealand with the hot air balloon , Paris with the beautiful Eiffel Tower and many more.

Well, I know you also have many place you always dream about, don’t you? Wherever it is, from the deepest of my heart, I pray that you will get there some day. No matter how far it is, keep dreaming, until life bring you there, someday.

—

Well, this is a hard decision for me. It’s like I want to tell you the secret of my life, because it is. This is sooo personal. But, let’s make it as a prayer, shall we? Well, the first place in my bucket list is Jerusalem. No, it’s not because that I’m a religious person. Definitely not. Well, when I was in an elementary school (or kindergarten? Sorry, I can’t remember the exact time), I watched a TV program with my dad. I’m not sure what kind of program it is. Again, I forget, sorry. I only remember that it showed a place called Jerusalem. My dad said “one day when you are big enough, invite me to go there with you, okay?”. No no, my dad talked in Indonesia. But let me keep it to myself. I promise I’ll tell you guys someday, when my family and I get there. Since then, Jerusalem is always be in my dream and my prayer. Worry not. Like I wrote on my writing 3 days ago, I am a dreamer with plan. You guys will see me catch my dream and be there one day. And on that day, I will come to this page again, and I will say “You get your first dream, go on, let’s check another list!” Can I get an amen for this? Hehe.

A Memory

When I was a student of a university, I spent most of my time in my room. I watched TV, sang out loud, binge reading (is it a word??), and many more. But one thing I love the most is spending time with my bestfriends. We watched Asian Games. We killed time and waited for the next class. We did our homework. We spent all night long and had deep talks. We laughed together in my room.

I never even think it is a special thing to spend time in a bedroom with some friends. Then this pandemic happens. All those things I mention before suddenly gone. This is the fifth months and I still can’t meet my friend. 

They say we will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory. Well, now I understand It. A moment where time run so fast. A moment I miss the most. A moment I can’t have right now.

Laughing with my friends in my small room.

A thing that now become a memory.

A thing I will never take for granted after we pass this hard time.

Things to Make Me Happy

 I can be happy over many things. Here are some of them. First, an ice cream. For me personally, an ice cream works like magic. When I am in a bad mood, feel sad over things I don’t know and on my period, ice cream fix it all! Whenever I buy an ice cream-well, the chocolate one is a plus- I will be instantly happy. Just like a little kid is happy when someone give her a candy.

I also love coffee. When I had much work to do. When I want to take some rest and watch something. When I feel stressed. When I want to enjoy the sunset. When I have a free time in the afternoon. A cup of coffee is a perfect friend.

And a book. I enjoy reading more than watching. When I read a book, I sink in to the words and forget my life for a moment. I always want to spend a day in a beach and read a book.

Well..

Having an ice cream while reading a book with the sound of dancing waves.

Spending an afternoon by sipping a cup of hot coffee with favorite music on.

Happy.

Describing Myself

 Well, i never think it is that hard to describe myself. So here we go.

Little Laura was like a rabbit. I was scared of mostly everything. I hate to go anywhere alone. I hate to meet new people. I hate to be in a new circumstance. Simply because I was too scared. I didn’t have any braveness at all. But then, life push me to my limit. I was forced to be brave to do everything. I had to go to a new place alone. I had to meet new people. I had to do many things with brave because I didn’t have any other choice. I had to do it. All alone. All by myself.

All things in my life made me try my best to do all my work alone. No matter how hard it is, as long as I could make it by myself, I will do it alone. Sometimes I seemed to be upset for no reason. But, the reason mostly because I was facing a problem and I was trying to work it out.

Last but not least, I am a dreamer. I have literally so many dreams. From the very little one to the big one. But, I also make a plan to achieve them one by one. I have my plan for the next year, for the next 3 years and so on. Yes, I am a dreamer and I make plan to catch it.

Now, it's your turn to describe yourself!